Dybbuk, by Ephraim Moshe Lilien, 1874–1925
When you’re an artist, it’s so important to have artist friends who have an inherent grasp of why you do what you do. I have a friend who was a year ahead of me at RISD, and I always love our conversations because she completely understands the artistic impulse. I don’t have to explain anything to her, she just gets it. She is incredibly energetic and lively, and I love feeding off her enthusiasm.
A few weeks ago, I was telling her that my current project had completely taken over my life, that I was on a compulsive creative rampage that I couldn’t stop even if I tried. She’s the same way; once I get stuck on an idea, I can’t leave it alone. I develop this sense of urgency in my work that I have to satisfy. I get so intensely focused that I give up a lot of personal time and comfort to fulfill the work.
My friend said that when she was a teenager and she got into that kind of mode, her mother would call it dybbuk. She described it as an uncontrollable creative drive that burns inside you. I looked up dybbuk later, and it was even darker than my friend’s description: “Dybbuk is a malicious possessing spirit believed to be the dislocated soul of a dead person. It supposedly leaves the host body once it has accomplished its goal, sometimes after being helped.” (Wikipedia)
I’d say that’s a pretty accurate description of how I’ve been feeling lately with my project. Despite some tough late nights I’ve had recently, I absolutely love this feeling. When I’m in this frame of mind, it’s like everything around me disappears. I’m so riveted by the work that I don’t even want to get up to eat lunch. That’s really saying something- I’m a big foodie, and I spend most days day dreaming about the next time I get to eat. The drive is strong enough that I can almost start to understand why those Silicon Valley engineers drink Soylent so they don’t have to interrupt their work.
If all goes well, I’ll get to share with you soon what has been possessing me over the past few months!
